Day 13

Originally written for writing your grief course done by Refugeingrief in September 2022

Day 13

Suicide is the ultimate 13th guest one of the first things I said when it was just myself my mom and my uncle ( moms older brother) Was what if dad comes up? How the fuck do I tell people. I still get anxious about disclosing the fact that I am a suicide loss survivor. So here’s my attempt to be the old wise woman in the fairytale: that brings the uncomfortable gift.


Suicide is not contagious nor is it a crime
Having said that suicide can impact anyone ar any time.
Suicide does not care about things like social or economic status Suicide does not descimate
Suicide does not occur out of selfishness: it occurs because at the time the person sees no other way out to end their emotional pain. I realize these truths are uncomfortable for those who haven’t experienced them.
If that is the case for you, truth be told I am grateful for I wish no one had to know the reality of these uncomfortable truths.
For those of us that have to live with these uncomfortable truths; please do not stigmatize or shame us for being honest about the fact we live with these uncomfortable truths. We did not choose to live with these uncomfortable truths.
We live with these truths because someone we love died by suicide not committed. With that said just a gentle reminder please be mindful and thoughtful with your words as they do matter. For you don’t know who has experienced these uncomfortable truths as some of us may not say. Out of the fear we will be met with judgement and stigma as is sadly sometimes the case. These uncomfortable truths associated with suicide exist weather you acknowledge them or not . They exist everyday for those of us left behind to pick up the pieces of our shattered lives as we navigate these uncomfortable truths.